Illuminati-R-Us

OK the silence has gone on long enough! :P

A set of identical twins was put up for adoption. One went to Spain and became Juan; the other went to Arabia and became Amal. After 20 years Juan tracked down his birth parents and visited. When he left, his mother said "I wonder how our other son is doing. Wouldn't you like to see him?" "Whatever for," replied the father, "once you've seen Juan you've seen Amal."

umop ap!sdn wrote:OK the silence has gone on long enough! :P

A set of identical twins was put up for adoption. One went to Spain and became Juan; the other went to Arabia and became Amal. After 20 years Juan tracked down his birth parents and visited. When he left, his mother said "I wonder how our other son is doing. Wouldn't you like to see him?" "Whatever for," replied the father, "once you've seen Juan you've seen Amal."

Didn't I just see this one somewhere?

umop ap!sdn wrote:OK the silence has gone on long enough! :P

Is this your entry in the "Worst Joke of the Board" contest?

No way in hell, Enzo already won!

Hark! I shall make a new "hot!" avatar featuring the one, the only Lt. Moosedoom. Should be up within the week!

Khrushchev's Other Shoe wrote:Didn't I just see this one somewhere?

Yeah, at the pjeoq. Served its purpose in resuscitating the thread. :D

hippietrekx wrote:Hark! I shall make a new "hot!" avatar featuring the one, the only Lt. Moosedoom. Should be up within the week!

Dragon Star wrote:

hippietrekx wrote:Hark! I shall make a new "hot!" avatar featuring the one, the only Lt. Moosedoom. Should be up within the week!

Oh, you're not even labeled as hot. Just (Dragon--->).

:P

That was low...

You're labeled Hot on my avatar! Isn't that good enough for you! :P :wink:

Here's a joke my dad sent me:

The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, Hello. Mrs. Ward, please.
Speaking.
Mrs Ward, this is Doctor Jones at the Medical Testing Laboratory. When your doctor sent your husband's biopsy to the lab yesterday, a biopsy from another Mr. Ward arrived as well, and we are now uncertain which one is your husband's. Frankly the results are either bad or
terrible.
What do you mean? Mrs. Ward asks nervously.
Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for AIDS. We can't tell which your husband's is.
That's dreadful! Can't you do the test again? questioned Mrs. Ward.
Normally we can, but Medicare will only pay for these expensive tests one time. Well, what am I supposed to do now?
The people at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him.

St. Jimmy wrote:You're labeled Hot on my avatar! Isn't that good enough for you! :P :wink:

No, and put that back in your pants.

teri tait wrote:The people at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him.

Hehe.

I feel like telling naughty jokes.

There once was a man from Woonsocket
Who stuck his c*** in a socket
Some son of a bitch
Turned on the switch
And he took off like a rocket.

umop ap!sdn wrote:Hehe.

I feel like telling naughty jokes.

There once was a man from Woonsocket
Who stuck his c*** in a socket
Some son of a bitch
Turned on the switch
And he took off like a rocket.

Houston we have a problem. . .

What's crappanin' in Arizona?! I heard on the news 6 people took over a high school and there's a standoff, right now!

Dragon Star wrote:

St. Jimmy wrote:You're labeled Hot on my avatar! Isn't that good enough for you! :P :wink:

No, and put that back in your pants.

Don't tell me you're pouting now....

hippietrekx wrote:

Dragon Star wrote:

St. Jimmy wrote:You're labeled Hot on my avatar! Isn't that good enough for you! :P :wink:

No, and put that back in your pants.

Don't tell me you're pouting now....

Wait...what? I don't care... :D

teri tait wrote:What's crappanin' in Arizona?! I heard on the news 6 people took over a high school and there's a standoff, right now!

I read about it here before catching it on the news.

I hope the whistle blower gets out unharmed.

umop ap!sdn wrote:

teri tait wrote:What's crappanin' in Arizona?! I heard on the news 6 people took over a high school and there's a standoff, right now!

I read about it here before catching it on the news.

I hope the whistle blower gets out unharmed.

But what do they want? What is the purpose of taking over a high school? Do they have demands? A mission statement? Or was it spur of the moment?

Since its on reservation land, is local/federal law enforcement involved?

I know when the few times I've handled claims from losses that occurred on indian land, there's a whole different set of rules to go by.

BTW have you seen any of those medicine circles? My mom told me they're pretty neat.

teri tait wrote:

umop ap!sdn wrote:

teri tait wrote:What's crappanin' in Arizona?! I heard on the news 6 people took over a high school and there's a standoff, right now!

I read about it here before catching it on the news.

I hope the whistle blower gets out unharmed.

But what do they want? What is the purpose of taking over a high school? Do they have demands? A mission statement? Or was it spur of the moment?

Since its on reservation land, is local/federal law enforcement involved?

I know when the few times I've handled claims from losses that occurred on indian land, there's a whole different set of rules to go by.

BTW have you seen any of those medicine circles? My mom told me they're pretty neat.

Nevermind, I just read it was all grossly overstated. . .no weapons. . . no hostages. . . no standoff. . .

Now I wonder what's really going on?!? UFO invasion? Scientific discovery held under wraps? Its could be a new Roswell type coverup. Have you seen a lot of MIBs running around?

I haven't, but I'll say something on here if I do. :D

Going over the last several pages, I see a pattern. This may be my undoing, but I'm gonna try anyway. Counterassassination attempt: I think Lance is trying to kill me with the word blood.

*scrunches eyes shut and waits for the sound of a gunshot...*

umop ap!sdn wrote:I haven't, but I'll say something on here if I do. :D

Going over the last several pages, I see a pattern. This may be my undoing, but I'm gonna try anyway. Counterassassination attempt: I think Lance is trying to kill me with the word blood.

*scrunches eyes shut and waits for the sound of a gunshot...*

wait... it this your third counter assassination attempt?

I believe it's #2... unless I've killed any targets in between, which would reset the counter.

umop ap!sdn wrote:I believe it's #2... unless I've killed any targets in between, which would reset the counter.

That's what I thought. Then unless your word happens to be "attempt" or something, you seem in the clear. Mmmmyep. I don't think you're in hot water right now.

Hey, Lance, what scent is your conditioner?

umop ap!sdn wrote:I think Lance is trying to kill me with the word blood.

If I were, it would look like this:

"Hey, umop, say 'blood'."

Why the heck would I want to kill you? I'm getting ready to send you a package right now. If I ship it, and you're dead, how will I get reimbursed for the postage. Sheesh! Silly umop. Or maybe I just wanted your home address so I could stalk you... 1... 2... 3... Yeah, maybe we can revive that thread.

hippietrekx wrote:Hey, Lance, what scent is your conditioner?

Suave Tropical Coconut. The llamas just love it, and Cyndi kind of likes it too.