Scientologist

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Postby Dragon Star » Sat Aug 05, 2006 5:24 am

teri tait wrote:Do Scientologists celebrate Christmas?


Good question. Run a Google and see if anything turns up. :lol:
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Postby Мастер » Wed Aug 30, 2006 7:34 pm

How many Scientologists does it take to change a light bulb?
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Postby St. Jimmy » Wed Aug 30, 2006 7:57 pm

[Studio audience]How many does it take!?[/Studio audience]
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Postby Lance » Thu Aug 31, 2006 12:40 pm

Khrushchev's Other Shoe wrote:How many Scientologists does it take to change a light bulb?

Scientology's Reply:
For $5,000, we will send you to an introductory seminar on how to change light bulbs. There you will learn that you have been changing light bulbs the wrong way. Future (pricier) seminars will teach you the right way.
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Postby Dragon Star » Thu Aug 31, 2006 5:29 pm

Lance wrote:
Khrushchev's Other Shoe wrote:How many Scientologists does it take to change a light bulb?

Scientology's Reply:
For $5,000, we will send you to an introductory seminar on how to change light bulbs. There you will learn that you have been changing light bulbs the wrong way. Future (pricier) seminars will teach you the right way.


:lol:

Witty.
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Postby Мастер » Thu Aug 31, 2006 5:32 pm

I thought scientologists could just imagine that the light bulb had been changed. But I don't really know too much about scientology. . .
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Postby Dragon Star » Thu Aug 31, 2006 5:36 pm

Good, you know everything already. :twisted: :lol:
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Postby Arneb » Thu Oct 13, 2011 8:37 pm

....says the Scientologist.
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Postby KLA2 » Sat Oct 15, 2011 3:42 am

I imagine the Scientologist would use Clear, rather than frosted, bulbs.
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Postby Arneb » Tue Oct 18, 2011 2:08 pm

Well, you're a scientolgist, so you ought to know.
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Postby KLA2 » Wed Oct 19, 2011 2:19 am

I am Spartacus! The err ... Scientologist.

Yes, the Scientologist Spartacus! In this thread. In this stupid ...

{Damn, who wrote this script? I hear you giggling, Tom. Kirk would never have put up with this ... what? The mike is still on??? Well, }
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Postby Arneb » Thu Oct 20, 2011 10:15 pm

You should express yourself Clearer.

Er...what?
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Postby Мастер » Fri Oct 21, 2011 10:10 am

None of you are scientologists!
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Postby Arneb » Fri Oct 21, 2011 10:56 pm

Why sure - after all, you are.
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Postby Мастер » Fri Oct 21, 2011 11:54 pm

Do I look like one?
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Postby KLA2 » Sat Oct 22, 2011 3:51 am

And what does a Scientologist look like?

... Oh Yeah. Battlefield Earth. Like John Travolta, after getting his wig caught in a blender. Heh. :wink:

http://www.imdb.com/media/rm3712653568/tt0185183
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Postby tubeswell » Fri Nov 04, 2011 3:01 pm

KLA2 wrote:And what does a Scientologist look like?


Several (about 3) decades ago (when I was 19), as I shambled along the footpath in lower Queen Street, Auckland, I was apprehended by an attractive female representative from the church of scientology who was standing outside the door of the scientology building looking for candidates to join their ranks. IIRC on that occasion the scientologist was clutching a clipboard full of scientology enrolment forms in one hand, with a pen in the other, and may even have been wearing a white lab coat. She was demure, well groomed, and appeared somewhat lacking in self-confidence. She asked me if I wanted to take a test. Being quite smashed at the time, my curiosity was piqued.

She lured me into the building and introduced me to guy in a suit (and lab coat). Then she went back outside dammit. Long story short, when I eventually extracated myself out of the building, she was chatting up the next guy. But by that time I was deep in the grip of paranoia, so I swiftly departed and am happy to say I've never been back in that building since.

True story. Mind you this was 30 years ago so my recollection of the details is a bit hazy.
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Postby Мастер » Fri Dec 09, 2011 4:30 pm

tubeswell wrote:True story. Mind you this was 30 years ago so my recollection of the details is a bit hazy.


Yes, I see you only remember the part they want you to remember!
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Postby Lianachan » Fri Dec 09, 2011 5:23 pm

KLA2 wrote:I am Spartacus! The err ... Scientologist.

Yes, the Scientologist Spartacus!


Scientartacus, perhaps?
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Postby Мастер » Sat Dec 10, 2011 1:08 pm

Hmm, the middle bit of that almost sounds like "Tartan".
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Postby KLA2 » Fri Dec 16, 2011 2:49 am

Me Tartan. You Brain.

Scientartacus. I like that. :lol:
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Postby tubeswell » Wed Jan 04, 2012 8:46 am

Is there a scientologist in the house?

Or is that just a Hubbard in the cupboard?
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Postby KLA2 » Sat Jan 07, 2012 2:40 am

Or a Cruise in the closet?

{Nod to Souihpark. For the record, I do not think Tom is gay, or bad ... just deluded.}
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Postby tubeswell » Sun Jan 15, 2012 5:14 pm

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.

If you are seeing an apparent paradox, that means you are missing something.
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Postby KLA2 » Tue Jan 17, 2012 3:41 am

The story I heard was that L. Ron Hubbard, a writer of mediocre science fiction, made a bet that he could invent a totally ludicrous "religion", and millions would believe in it. That people were that gullible.

He won the bet.
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