The Corrupt-A-Wish Game

[Мастер]

Shua is there. His unit was ordered to invade your town and raze it to the ground.

I wish Shua hadn't destroyed Moose's town.

[Capt. Moosedoom]

He didn't destroy it. It was a dream. But not the part about him being here.

I wish shua had some food. He is hungry.

[Мастер]

Shua does have some food. What do you think happened to those kittens you mentioned?

I wish kittens didn't taste so good.

[troubleagain]

They don't, but you have to eat them anyway.

I wish I were at home.

[Capt. Moosedoom]

There's a moose in your bedroom.

I wish I had more money than you.

[pmcolt]

Congress passes a new stimulus package: "Money for Moose." It still doesn't stop the lava flow or save the kittens.

I wish the weekend were a little longer.

[Мастер]

The weekend is a little longer. However, lots of stuff breaks every Friday evening when the Earth's rotation slows down, and then again Monday morning when it speeds up again.

I wish I knew what to do.

[troubleagain]

You do...and you really don't like it.

I wish my garden were already weeded and mulched.

[Capt. Moosedoom]

It is, but everything you plant now dies.

I wish my I would stop posting and do my homework.

[Мастер]

Your homework requires posting.

I wish the section of the bicycle trail that is closed, would reopen.

[Arneb]

They do, but they haven't repaired the potholes.

I wish our juniors ware a little more rational.

[troubleagain]

They do, but they haven't repaired the potholes.

I wish our juniors ware a little more rational.

They are, but they have a bedside manner like House.


I wish I weren't allergic to pollens.

[Capt. Moosedoom]

you aren't. Your'e allergic to air.

I wish this was all planned.

[troubleagain]

It is, but....no I don't want to corrupt that one. I want it all to be right for you.


I wish my camera battery would hurry up and get here.

[Capt. Moosedoom]

:D :D

It does, i sent them inside expired pie :D

I wish i had a sandwich.

[Мастер]

You do have a sandwich. You're also sitting next to a three hundred pound bald guy named "Bubba", who is very hungry.

I wish my printer hadn't run out of ink.

[Capt. Moosedoom]

it did'nt but then you have to print all of my wedding invitations

I wish I hadn't eaten the last 5 things i ate.

[Мастер]

You didn't. The last thing ate you instead.

I wish I were at Moose's first wedding.

[Capt. Moosedoom]

You killed lance and became the first groom. We got divorced though.

I wish that guy that gave me his number today had seen a ring on my finger and decided not to try.

[Arneb]

He decided not to, and now you can't reach your wedding manager.

I wish I could get rid of that belly.

[troubleagain]

You do--it all turns into boob.

I wish my wrist didn't hurt.

[Arneb]

It doesn't. The other one takes over.

I wish Barcelona would find a way to crack the Inter defense.

[Мастер]

Barcelona does find a way to crack the Inter defense. Because of the method they used, all members of the Barcelona team are now awaiting trial at the Hague.

I wish I didn't have to take my bicycle to the shop every few days.

[Capt. Moosedoom]

you don't. Instead you have blistering headaches any time you touch your bike.

I wish this homework were dooonnnneeee

[troubleagain]

It doesn't. The other one takes over.

That would be acceptable, since I'm right-handed.

The homework IS done, but now there's a paper due.


I wish I already had a Mother's Day gift purchased.