Illuminati-R-Us

by **St. Jimmy** » Tue Dec 19, 2006 3:12 am

Well I don't think I'll come right out and say how I'm going to corrupt this wish, but just use your head and think perverted. :wink: :lol:

I wish I hadn't almost passed out today.

by **pmcolt** » Wed Dec 20, 2006 3:29 am

You didn't almost pass out. You passed out. You woke up a mile away, in a ditch, to find that your wallet had been stolen, along with your pants and your housekeys.

I wish we could have a white Christmas here in the Old North State, as well.

by **Lance** » Wed Dec 20, 2006 2:19 pm

You wake up Christmas Eve morning and it's cloudy and cool. About noon, light, fluffy snow begins to fall. By dusk, there is just enough ground cover so you can't see the grass, but the roads are still clear so everyone makes it home from work and shopping safely. By morning, 17 feet of snow has fallen, paralyzing the town. People can't even get out of their houses to take Purina Llama Chow to the stables so all the llamas, and other livestock, starve to death. Children can't get to school so they grow up illiterate and all marry their own cousins, destroying the town's future. You realize this is all your fault so you try to shovel all the snow over to the neighboring town's high school football field but there is too much. You die in the cold, only to be found in the Spring, two years later, half eaten by the Polar Bears which now live there because it has become so arctic-like.

I wish I didn't have more lights to still put up.

by **hippietrekx** » Sat Dec 23, 2006 5:17 am

They're all up. Now, take them down! *mwhahaha*

I wish my mom would make an effort to enjoy Christmas.

by **St. Jimmy** » Sat Dec 23, 2006 4:56 pm

She makes such an effort that she doesn't allow you to do anything but watch Christmas movies, make cookies, and spend time with her. And because she now thinks Christmas should be a family thing, you aren't allowed to go anywhere and noone's allowed to come over during Christmas break. You can't even go to bowling practice. Enjoy sepnding two uniterrupted weeks with your mom! :lol:

I wish hippie's mom would let me come over during Christmas break.

by **hippietrekx** » Sun Dec 24, 2006 5:57 am

You come over. And clean.

I wish I didn't know EVERY present I'm getting from my parents...

by **St. Jimmy** » Sun Dec 24, 2006 4:54 pm

You don't know any of the presents you're getting. You wake up tomorrow and find out that you didn't know what you were getting becasue you weren't getting anything for christmas. Merry Christmas!

I wish, I could eat Loaded Potato Bites® from Arby's® everyday.

by **hippietrekx** » Sun Dec 24, 2006 6:59 pm

You develop an allergy. :twisted:

I wish my mom wouldn't be so... off her estrogen today...

by **St. Jimmy** » Mon Dec 25, 2006 1:51 am

SHe becomes so on her estrogen that she OD's onthe pills and dies. You can no longer afford you'r house payments, and get kicked out your house and live on the street both you and your dad develop pnemonia and also die because you can't afford to go to the hospital.

I wish I get Guitar Hero for Christmas.

by **hippietrekx** » Mon Dec 25, 2006 1:56 am

It's Richard Simmons wearing a Superman shirt and toting along a guitar with a big bow on his head. Enjoy!

I wish I had a door.

by **St. Jimmy** » Mon Dec 25, 2006 2:15 am

YOu make a duct tape door, and tomorrow night find out that it is not even close to soundproof and you listen to the headboard for three hours. MWWUUHAHAHAHA!

I wish duct tape was soundproof, so hippie doesn't complain about it.

by **hippietrekx** » Mon Dec 25, 2006 2:21 am

I complain about you instead and kick your sorry ass to the curb.

I wish Jimmy would die and stop bringing up the headboard. *shudder*

BTW, by three hours, you mean ten minutes, right?

by **St. Jimmy** » Mon Dec 25, 2006 2:32 am

I die, and everyone thinks I died of a broken heart and no guys want you at all, and so you end up being lonely for the rest of your life. Oh BTW, Bryan now brings it up.

I wish it was 10:00am tomorrow, right now.

Well, it replays in your head for three hours.

by **hippietrekx** » Mon Dec 25, 2006 2:37 am

You miss a lot of chatting later with me.

I wish Jimmy would trim his hair a little so he doesn't look like Farrah...

by **St. Jimmy** » Mon Dec 25, 2006 2:41 am

Little is a very relative term. I tirm it a "little" and end up with my hair looking like when Ronoh got his cut.

I wish I didn't lose most of my hair to corrupt that wish.

by **pmcolt** » Mon Dec 25, 2006 3:22 am

You didn't lose it. You swept it all up and gave it to hippie, who used her duct-tape skills to turn it into a wig for you to wear. But you put it on the wrong way, and by the time you manage to peel it off of your face, "A Christmas Story" is over.

I wish we had pecan pie.

by **hippietrekx** » Mon Dec 25, 2006 4:36 am

It's burnt. (We had a burnt one for Thanksgiving. Icky.)

I wish my mom would go to bed so I could apply the suprise they'll see in the morning...

by **St. Jimmy** » Mon Dec 25, 2006 6:40 am

Sorry to bring it up again, but......

She goes to bed, and 40 minutes later you hear that dreaded headboard. the nosie finally stops at 3:00am, and by the time you're sure that they are asleep, and you get the surprise all done, it's 4:30. You get to bed and can't fall asleep because you are still so sickened by the headboard. you finally fall asleep it's 7:00am, and you mom wakes you up at 9:00am. Good luck on your 2-hours of sleep!

I wish my mom always sleeps in her chair.

by **hippietrekx** » Tue Dec 26, 2006 4:50 am

So does your dad. "Ooooh baby! That's the spot!"

I wish I didn't have to clean the bathroom as soon as I got up...

by **umop ap!sdn** » Tue Dec 26, 2006 6:57 am

You have to clean it at night, before you go to bed, and you're very tired.

I wish the cats would keep their stomach contents off the carpet.

by **pmcolt** » Tue Dec 26, 2006 9:30 am

Very well: they leave it all over your keyboard and monitor instead.

I wish this year would end.

by **St. Jimmy** » Wed Dec 27, 2006 1:36 am

It ends. So does the world. Congratulations, we will never see 2007, because you ended the world. What will you do next? Go to disney land? Oh wait...YOU CAN'T because you ended the world. Way to go.

I wish the Moon doesn't end along with the Earth.

by **hippietrekx** » Wed Dec 27, 2006 4:09 am

It gets flung into deep space and turns into another 100136/Pluto.

I wish I knew for certain if that is Pluto's numerical designation...

by **pmcolt** » Fri Jan 05, 2007 8:31 am

(134340) Pluto is renumbered as (100136) Pluto at the next IAU conference for no apparent reason. Sick of the controversy surrounding Pluto, NASA launches New Horizons 2 toward the planet/dwarf planet/minor planet/plutino/trans-Neptunian object carrying enough nukular warheads to completely obliterate it.

I wish my room were about 1 ft. larger in each dimension.

by **St. Jimmy** » Sat Jan 06, 2007 2:25 am

CongratulationsYourRoomIsNow1BabyFootWiderOnEachSide.

IWishMyKeyboardDidn'tGetWaterSpilledOnItByMyDad.

Illuminati-R-Us

The Corrupt-A-Wish Game

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