It's time once O'Gain...

[Enzo]

Alright.

What is a mile long and has an IQ of 40?


[spoiler]The St. Patrick's Day Parade, of course.[/spoiler]

Yes the annual homage to stupidity. COllege students puking up green beer their parents ultimately paid for. People eating corned beef and cabbage for no apparent reason.

Now a beer in a tartan pattern would be something, but green?

The local morning radio show host who fancies himself Irish is doing his show live and remote from Ireland tomorrow. Yessir, nothing like the old world sound of an Irish radio studio to compare to the US studios. Between the local news, weather, and traffic reports from back here, I just bet he talks to some people with Irish accents. It'll be like the time the Celtic music group came here.


And who is white and stays out all summer?

[spoiler]Paddy O'Furniture.[/spoiler]

[umop ap!sdn]

Oh yeah, that's already the day after tomorrow!

I have my article of green clothing set aside. :D

[St. Jimmy]

This is a random song I found I thought it fit this thread quite nicely.

"Well a Scotsman clad in kilt left a bar one evening fair
And one could tell by how he walked the he'd drunk more than his share
He fumbled 'round until he could no longer keep his feet
And he stumbled off in to the grass to sleep beside the street

Ring-ding didle idle i de-o
Ring dye didley i oh
He stumbled off in to the grass to sleep beside the street

About that time two young and lovely girls just happened by
One says to the other, with a twinkle in her eye
"See yon sleeping Scotsman, so strong a handsome built?
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt."

Ring-ding didle idle i de-o
Ring dye didley i oh
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt

They crept up on that sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be
Lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see
And there, behold, for them to view beneath his Scotish skirt
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth

Ring-ding didle idle i de-o
Ring dye didley i oh
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth

They marveled for a moment, then one said "We must be gone.
Let's leave a present for our friend before we move along"
As a gift they left a blue silk ribbon tied in to a bow
Around the bonnie star the Scot's kilt did lift and show

Ring-ding didle iidle i de-o
Ring dye didley i oh
Around the bonnie star the scot's kilt did lift and show

Now the Scotsman woke to nature's call and stumbled towards the trees
Behind the bush he lifts his kilt, and gawks at what he sees
And in a startled voice he says, to what's before his eyes,
"Lad, I don't know where ya been, but I see you've won first prize"

Ring-ding didle idle i de-o
Ring dye didley i oh
Lad, I don't know where you've been, but I see you've won first prize"

[Heid the Ba]

You do know that Scotland and Ireland are not the same thing? We don't celebrate St Patrick's day here.

Still, as a kilt wearing ScotI apreciate the sentiment. :D

[troubleagain]

Nice legs. :)

[Heid the Ba]

You do realise I'm the one in the middle?

[Superluminal]

Refresh me memory. The purse thingy hanging down in front, where you put your vittles, is a sporan, your wearing a pair of brogans and is that a skin doo tucked in your stockings?

[St. Jimmy]

You do know that Scotland and Ireland are not the same thing? We don't celebrate St Patrick's day here.

Still, as a kilt wearing ScotI apreciate the sentiment. :D

So is it true what ye don' wear b'neath the kilt? :wink: :P

[Lance]

Nothing is worn beneath the kilt.

It's all in perfect working order.

(But that's because it's never used.)

[hippietrekx]

You do know that Scotland and Ireland are not the same thing?

Heid, you do realise that we go to public American schools, right? Heck, you're lucky we know the difference between Greenland and Australia. :wink:

[Lance]

Difference?

The way I learned it back in the day, there is The U.S. and NOT The U.S. ( = The Third World) which is inhabited by people that wish they were from the U.S.

[hippietrekx]

Difference?

The way I learned it back in the day, there is The U.S. and NOT The U.S. ( = The Third World) which is inhabited by people that wish they were from the U.S.

Oh yeah, it's just like that now, except we have to learn where these people come from so that we can become tolerant to their cultures when they all move here.

[troubleagain]

You do realise I'm the one in the middle?

Well, duh! You're the only one whose legs are showing!

[Heid the Ba]

Refresh me memory. The purse thingy hanging down in front, where you put your vittles, is a sporan, your wearing a pair of brogans and is that a skin doo tucked in your stockings?

Sporran, brogues and skein dhu; you know your Scottish acoutrements. :D

Oh yeah, it's just like that now, except we have to learn where these people come from so that we can become tolerant to their cultures when they all move here.

Outstanding!

[Lance]

we can become tolerant to their cultures

Yeah...

We never had that part.

[Enzo]

Army recruiting commercial:


Young men with high school diplomas,
Thinking about college?
Well, think again.
Now you can spend two years in today's action Army,
learning useless skills.
CHeck the benefits:
Regular monthly payments in case of disability,
FREE aritifical limbs in case of loss!
Why now you can visit exciting foreign lands
meet interesting people
and kill them.

Be an Army of One


(Of course when I wrote that, it was today's action Army wants to join you. Then later it was Be all you can Be.)


Given an unlabeled map of the world, at least 90% of US students couldn't locate Ireland Or Scotland. Hell they wouldn't find Texas either.

[hippietrekx]

we can become tolerant to their cultures

Yeah...

We never had that part.

Explains my dad.

[Superluminal]

I heard on a commercial that 21% of American teenagers can't find the Pacific Ocean on a map. I can't help but wonder, what percentage of that 21% live in California within site of the Pacific?

[Enzo]

I bet it is proportional. Living next to it doesn't provide map skills.

Once I asked my standard what is the capital of Nebraska question of a girl at an information counter, and she didn't know. Couldn't come up with Ohio's capital either. I then asked what was the capital of Michigan here. She thought a moment or two, looked troubled, and asked back, "That's not Lansing is it?" Why yes it is, good job. Of course we were standing in Lansing at the time.

[The Beer Slayer]

I heard on a commercial that 21% of American teenagers can't find the Pacific Ocean on a map. I can't help but wonder, what percentage of that 21% live in California within site of the Pacific?

Probably the same percentage that doesn't know the difference between "site" and "sight."