Illuminati-R-Us

It begins tomorrow with our noble Saffer lads taking on Dublin born Eoin Morgan and his band of tossers. The English have cut down on the number of Diggers and Saffers in the team but did fast track in a Barbados born bowler by greatly reducing the qualification period. I expect to change allegiance in an entirely predictable pattern over the coming weeks.

My allegiance will not waver throughout the entire tournament. I will support nobody, with great passion.

The Great Satan (Chelsea) won the Euro League against some other Lunnin club, the one withMesht Özil in it.4-1, in Baku. Yawn.

Arneb wrote:The Great Satan (Chelsea) won the Euro League against some other Lunnin club, the one withMesht Özil in it.4-1, in Baku. Yawn.

At cricket?

No, I thought I was in the "What Sports Team Do You Support" thread...

Eng-ger-lund -v- Saffers just now, England batted first and did ok, SA chasing 312.

Saffers let us all down. WIndies -v- Pak today, hoping for a Pakistani win since Chris Gayle is such a cunt.

Heid the Ba wrote:It begins tomorrow with our noble Saffer lads taking on Dublin born Eoin Morgan and his band of tossers. The English have cut down on the number of Diggers and Saffers in the team but did fast track in a Barbados born bowler by greatly reducing the qualification period. I expect to change allegiance in an entirely predictable pattern over the coming weeks.

You may as well be speaking Mongolian to me there

South Africa played England. The English captain was born in Dublin and still has a "begorrah" accent. England do not have as many South Africans and Australians playing for them as they used to. The qualifying period for England used to be seven years but a WIndies fast bowler wanted to play for them so it was magically reduced to two years and he qualified six weeks ago. He was the best England player yesterday.

Thanks for the translation

Eng-ger-lund looked very good against the Saffers the other day, but now the Banglas are looking just as good against them. Maybe the Saffers are just a bit shit just now. The WIndies beat Pak easily the other day and the media are talking them up but they got lucky, good teams will work them out.

Banglas won, could have beaten them by far, far more.

Eng-ger-lund are trying the same tactic the WIndies used against Pakistan but the shifty foreigners seem to have learned their lesson and are coping with the English bowling easily. Is that allowed?

It isn't, and if the colonies don't start behaving, the Boris will teach them not to cross the Empire.

I believe the appropriate expression is “it’s just not cricket”.

Pak beat England in a close game that either team could have won easily.

Afghan -v- Lankans today in rainy Wales. Duckworth Lewis Stern deployed and the Afghanis are slogging away, probably to victory. Particularly if it starts to rain again.

Heid the Ba wrote:Afghan -v- Lankans today in rainy Wales. Duckworth Lewis Stern deployed and the Afghanis are slogging away, probably to victory. Particularly if it starts to rain again.

I saw this one on the electric television, but I think I need to do some work before I really understand it properly.

If rain reduces the number of overs which can be played then there is a formula developed by Messrs Duckworth and Lewis to calculate how to fairly set a target for the side batting second. As trends in cricket change the system is adapted to cope, and this is now done by Stern. It seems well regarded but I've never looked at how it works.
Edit: Afghanistan should have won yesterday but apparently they struggle when they bat second.

Saffers -v- India and Bangla -v- Kiwis. India's first game and they should win, as should the Kiwis but Bangla are a decent side.

Oh dearie me, the Saffers look very ordinary indeed. It puts England's win against them in context.

I would have put my pension on Dhoni seeing them home, which is why I don't bet. Wins for India and NZ.

Australia seem determined to fuck up against WIndies.

Pak -v- Lanka should have started half an hour ago but it is pissing down, quite possibly no play at all today.

India beat Australia at the weekend in a strangely subdued encounter where Australia seemed happy to lose a close game rather than try to win.

Yesterday's game was rained off and today's is heading the same way.