RIP: Jason Ingber
Posted: Tue Aug 24, 2021 5:53 pmOn August 1st, my sister-in-law's husband lost his battle with depression. He was an immensely gifted artist, all-around decent guy and far too young. My oldest son instantly took a liking to him when he started dating my sister-in-law only about five years ago. At the time, he was doing very well: the medication was doing its job, and I think he really saw a future with my sister-in-law. Over time, though, the medication became less effective, and doubts and anxiety crept in. When the pandemic hit, that creep started moving faster. Not going in to work and losing a lot of routine and structure really hit him hard. He hoped changing jobs would help, but it didn't. He quit, and got another job, but probably only worked a day or two a week. He had tried treatment and therapy, and different medications, although there was some mis-communication between a couple of his doctors, and it seems likely that for a little while at least, the doses/combination was less than optimal. He never got into heavy drinking or drugs, for better or worse. On some level, I think I'd rather he were a drunk or an addict - maybe he'd still be alive and possibly some hope for a better life. But there's also a lot of pain and suffering on that path, and no guarantee of a long life or recovery.
I'll remember the good times, though. He never minded when my son would talk with him non-stop through all the family gatherings. He cherished and adored my sister-in-law, who loved him immensely. In fact, they were marching in the St. Patrick's Day parade in Sioux Falls when he stopped the whole thing, and proposed to her there. It was all prearranged, of course, but somehow, the whole family was able to keep the secret long enough. They even let me sing at their wedding - Diana Ross's "If We Hold on Together."
It's almost cliche to say something like this after someone has taken their own life, but I mean it: take care of yourselves. Find someone you can talk to, who would hold your hand, or give you a hug, love and encouragement. And if you know someone who might need those things, help them find someone who can.
I'll remember the good times, though. He never minded when my son would talk with him non-stop through all the family gatherings. He cherished and adored my sister-in-law, who loved him immensely. In fact, they were marching in the St. Patrick's Day parade in Sioux Falls when he stopped the whole thing, and proposed to her there. It was all prearranged, of course, but somehow, the whole family was able to keep the secret long enough. They even let me sing at their wedding - Diana Ross's "If We Hold on Together."
It's almost cliche to say something like this after someone has taken their own life, but I mean it: take care of yourselves. Find someone you can talk to, who would hold your hand, or give you a hug, love and encouragement. And if you know someone who might need those things, help them find someone who can.
